Radical Boundaries
finding your own path to peace
Enjoying our backyard and the sunshine - October 2023
Earlier this summer, a friend of mine asked me if I had anything to share from my experience on the subject of boundaries.
”Oh, I don’t know.” I said. “Let me think about it for a few days - I’ll gather my thoughts and share some ideas.”
It turned out I didn’t need a few days, or any time at all. When I took the time to check in with myself, I realized I’ve learned quite a lot about boundaries over the past few years. I don’t remember what I shared with my friend, but this subject is on my heart this morning.
Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.
Proverbs 4:23
If boundaries are something you’ve struggled with, you’re not alone. What has been the most helpful to me on this particular journey is remembering it’s not actually about what the boundaries are “keeping out” or “stopping.”
These were fun for a week last year - October 2023
Having radical boundaries, and using them whenever you need to, is about what you are embracing. What feelings or energies do you want MORE of in your life? Some examples for me are peace, joy, ease and freedom. These are priorities, and always will be. If someone’s actions or “demands” on my energy create a pattern of them bursting through my peace, the dynamic needs to change.
This isn’t always easy to notice. Even with my commitment this year to sitting in silence at least five minutes a day, it’s still a challenge to be mindful about my emotions and needs.
If you need to tell someone to back off, that’s OK. If you need to tell someone you can’t put anything else on your plate, do it. The next time you go for a walk or take a shower, take five minutes and decide what’s most important to you right now.
With everything that’s swirling around in the world, what is essential for you to stay connected to your essence?
If these questions or ideas are driving you nuts, or you have no idea what I’m talking about - it’s all right. Maybe your boundaries are just fine! I have a favor to ask, though: if you hear from a loved one, friend, or acquaintance that they’re having a hard time with this, could you please share this post with them? The world needs more peace right now, and will continue to do so. The last thing we need is more drama and distraction.
Thank you for paying attention. Thank you for being you.
The Rose Garden in Duluth, Minnesota a few weeks ago - October 2024
One last note: This morning, I learned that “radical” in music, linguistics, math and botany means “relating to, belonging to, or springing from the root.” I LOVE this. By tending to our roots - being radical - we become more connected to our true self.
We are peace - we just have to find our way.
Love you,
Nikki
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